Now

Feelings

Brain stuff

Adderall continues to treat my brain well, but we’re still adjusting my other medications around it. I have a crash at the end of the day once the Adderall wears off and some difficulty getting out of bed in the morning. We’re hoping a slightly higher dose of my anti-depressants (Cymbalta) can improve my baseline energy whenever Adderall isn’t in my system.

I still think most of my other mental health symptoms are primarily from unmanaged ADHD. They have improved SO much since getting diagnosed and starting medication. Originally I was hoping I could take the anti-depressants out completely, but I’m less optimistic about that now. It’d be cool not to take another pill or two per day, but I’ll probably be on some combo of meds my whole life, and that’s better than the alternative.

This month, my insurance has been very annoying (basically, they won’t cover me taking more than one pill of Cymbalta per day, even though there’s no way to get my dose in a single pill). While getting this all sorted out, I ran out of my Cymbalta and can really tell a difference in terms of energy level and mood. Little things have felt like HUGE things, and the other day I teared up at a toddler song because it was so sweet (this is not how I usually am these days, haha).

Finch app

I’ve been really enjoying Finch, which is a self-care focused app. I’ve been using it for my self-care goals and I find it surprisingly motivating. If I do my silly little self-care tasks, I can get virtual clothes or furniture for my bird, win-win!

I mainly use the tasks and reflections, but they also have a ton of additional activities, including quick mindfulness and physical activities, soundscapes for sleeping, and so on. I also like looking back to see my mood/reflections over time. I’m not always great at identifying emotions or relating them to bigger patterns, and it’s been really helpful for that.

Some of the tasks I use it for: Taking my meds every day, washing my face, brushing my teeth in the morning and evening, spending time outside, and putting away one item that is not in its place. I also add things like laundry, showering, etc. on days that I want to do those.

If you end up trying Finch, let me know and we can be friends!

Social media

I’ve been way less into Twitter since the Elon Musk acquisition. I’m actually pretty sad about that since Twitter was previously my most used social platform. It’s just no longer as enjoyable in a lot of ways. Now, when I log on, things are half-broken and everyone is talking about the latest bad decision Musk is making. It feels like the end of an era, and there’s nothing that’s really come up as a true replacement.

It’s been nice having more mental space, since sometimes Twitter is just a factory for outrage. But I do need to figure out another way to get news since that was my primary news source before. I find I’m a little more disconnected, though that’s not necessarily a bad thing.

I’m also not as into Instagram as I used to be. I’m kind of tired of feeling like I’m just being sold to on different social media platforms. Capitalism is so boring to me.

Projects

• I’ve been having a ton of fun with cross stitch and embroidery! I’ve been really inspired by /r/VisibleMending as well to fix up a few things.

• I’m also thinking of starting a hat soon… I haven’t knit since 2020 and I’m finally feeling the mojo!

• I’m back to streaming on Twitch after a little holiday break! I finished the first part of the freeCodeCamp JavaScript course and I’m so proud. It was not easy for me 😅

• I published my Twitch stream setup!

Fun stuff

Lewks

I’m going through a My Chemical Romance, Taylor Momsen-inspired era. I feel like I’m really embracing the punk-y, emo side I always wanted to be as a teenager, and it’s been really fun! I feel like a lot of us are just trying to be who we thought was cool when we were teens.

I’ve also decided I’m into earrings, and have added some really fun indie ones to my collection. I’ve been really into kikay!, an indie brand that does super fun acrylic earrings.

I got my eyebrows microbladed and freckles. I’ve been wanting both done for YEARS and I’m so glad I finally did it! It’s so nice having fuller eyebrows without putting any effort in, and freckles are just plain cute. If you’ve been thinking of getting your brows or freckles done, I can’t recommend it enough.